I've lost it...

My resolve...

It seems to have fled somewhere and I cannot find it.

I have been on this weight loss journey for over a year.  I'm tired.

There was success.  Very slow and hard earned success.  I lost a total of 27 pounds (2 sizes) before I hit a plateau and lost my resolve.

Earlier this summer I realized I was teetering on the edge of falling off the wagon so I switched from trying to lose to trying to maintain. That gave me enough extra calories each day to not feel quite as deprived.  In the last couple of weeks, I have noticed that at some point, I began allowing myself to pop a bite or two of something in my mouth and I wasn't tracking it.

Not good.

I refuse to allow myself to go backwards.

I haven't gained any weight back, I'm still at my low, but I'm afraid if I don't find my motivation soon, I will begin to move backwards.  I absolutely do not want to do that.

I also have not been running lately.  No excuse, I've just let myself get so busy that I haven't made time.

I don't have an answer yet and I'm still searching for that resolve that was so strong for most of the last year.  If you find it, could you please send it my way?